Sometimes I Cry: The Abuse of Validation

Avnique Gill, Reporter

I think we can all agree growing up we always had someone to look up to. Someone with great accomplishments, excellent grades, and someone we wanted to be when we grew up.
Growing up, I always looked up to my sisters and their achievements in life. I thought if I wasn’t able to make the same achievements they did, have the same grades that they had, and be as good at every sport they played, I wouldn’t be successful in life.
Growing up, I wasn’t a straight-A student like my sisters. There was always one subject that was lower than the rest. I always thought that I didn’t study long enough and didn’t push myself hard enough. It always had something to do with me.
I wasn’t the best at every sport they played, never got MVP, and I never outshine them.
However, as time passed, I realized this was me simply searching for constant validation from others to tell me that I was good enough. I wanted to be told that I met their expectations of me as a person and that I lived up to their standards.
The validation of others to tell me that I was good enough had a grip on me and how I lived my life.
However, now I realize validation isn’t about your grade point average, your extracurriculars, or even the sport you play.
Validation comes from what you make your life to be. It’s you being happy in the position you’re in, you being able to say that you’re okay where you are.
The goal of athletic and academic excellence may be far-fetched for many individuals. Life should never be about validation from others rather than validation from yourself. Although I do catch myself feeling that I need validation from others when someone comments on my work, I now understand that the only validation anyone needs is validation from themselves.