From Antisocial to Slightly Less Antisocial
May 18, 2020
While four years in one place seems to be close to an eternity, that’s not the case at all. As the four years pass, each one becomes shorter and shorter. Before you know it, you’re already a senior.
For me, high school didn’t seem all that important since it was merely another place for me to continue my education. However, I came to realize that it is more than that, it’s place for growth as well as a stepping stone for the future. Before starting high school, I was asked if I wanted to join an honors class by my teacher so I could get her recommendation. I accepted the offer not out of wanting to do it for myself, but rather I accepted because I prefered the idea of being in a higher class. That was also the time in which the idea of what others thought of me became more important to me than what I wanted to do.
I had no complete connections with anyone new as I hadn’t bothered to put in any effort in as well. I had no motivation to try to do anything out of my comfort zone since I didn’t know what it would lead to. To top that off, I had no clear direction of what I wanted to do with my education, or what career I wanted to pursue or so I thought. I was taking classes just because and though I was putting in effort, it wasn’t an effort that had any backing.
It really wasn’t until my junior that I just completely disregarded my previous thought process. Why do I have to care about what others think about me? I can do what I want because I can. There is no reason to put myself on hold because my own ideas were holding me back. It was the first time that I allowed myself to let go of my self-deprecating ideas and just made myself grow however I wanted. It wasn’t all because I did it myself, but it was because I was “surrounded”, let’s go with that, that I was able to grow as a person.
There is one person in particular that pushed me the most, but others were there along the way. I didn’t need to close off from those that I had a connection with because they already knew how I was. There were many times in which it was possible that I would never be in the place that I am now if actions beyond my control were taken. Yet, here I am, thankful for the road that led me to this spot. If not for it, I never would have met such amazing people that have changed me in one or another.
I would say that high school isn’t “fun” until you meet the right people for you while you have the right mindset. Friends definitely make the ride all the more enjoyable.
Don’t worry too much. Things should be able to sort themselves out when the time comes. That happened to me. I knew what I wanted subconsciously, I just never acted on it. However, if you don’t have things figured out, you need to start figuring it out. No pressure, but pressure.
Don’t take things too seriously, says the serious and monotone person. It’s not just about the destination that you’re heading too, because the journey matters just as much, so make every moment count.