Somehow a Senior

I can’t believe it’s my turn to write my senior column. It’s crazy to think that my four years of high school are coming to an end. Well… not yet. We still have most of the year to go, but still, this is my last year at Selma High.

It feels like just last year I was a nervous little freshman who didn’t know their way around campus. To be honest I still feel like a kid sometimes, at least someone who is way too young to be a senior. I had always seen seniors as the “super cool upperclassmen” who had everything together and had “made it” in life. Now that I’m here, I realize that you never really “make it.”

Our lives are really just getting started. After this year, we will all go our separate ways, some going to college and some starting their own lives right away. 

When I first came to Selma High, I hardly knew anyone outside of a few people from dance and my fifth grade year at Wilson Elementary because I had gone to a different middle school. It was a pretty hard transition at first, but I had my sister to help ease me into high school life, which I’m super grateful for. 

This moment kind of came full circle for me the other day when I was walking from my calculus class to english. Literally every two to five seconds as I was walking, people I had gotten to know over the years passed, smiled, and said hi. It doesn’t seem very out of the ordinary, but something about this moment made me realize just how far I’ve come from the new girl who knew hardly anyone to someone who had gotten to know so many different faces and special individuals at Selma High.

Looking back, I’m happy with the majority of how my high school years went. I can’t say I regret anything, though I do wish I had learned a couple important lessons earlier. 

When the pandemic hit at the end of my sophomore year, it made me take a step back and evaluate how I was spending my time in high school. I have always been a perfectionist, and getting straight A’s has always been one of my top priorities. However, without really realizing it, I was putting myself under so much stress to complete all of my assignments to the best of my ability that I neglected finding time to rest and do other things that I love. 

This doesn’t sound like a bad thing at first because trying your best and caring about your education are good qualities to have right? Well, I was overdoing it. Coming home from school, doing my homework, going to dance, coming home, eating dinner late, finishing my homework, hardly getting enough sleep… The cycle repeated. I thought putting my all into school and dance would make me feel accomplished and happy, when in reality I was only wearing myself out. The pandemic allowed me to realize that my motives for success were in the wrong place. I learned to reframe my mindset from needing to do things perfectly just for the sake of perfection to doing things to the best of my ability so I feel accomplished, no matter the physical result. To tell the truth, I still have to remind myself to not put so much pressure on myself, but I’m grateful that I get to spend senior year with a better mentality about how I view school and life. 

My high school years were more than just my experience at Selma High. It was more than just going to my classes and participating in the typical activities that come with high school like dances, games, and fun activities. It was growing as an individual, spending time with friends outside of school, and always having my family by my side when life’s stress was weighing on me. Something that I will never take for granted is getting to know so many great people who are probably going to go on to do amazing things in life. 

I have definitely grown these past four years of my life and will be forever grateful to have been a Selma Bear.